As we approach the start of a fresh, new season, it occurred to us here at FenwayNation that maybe we, as Red Sox fans, should set the example of decorum for the national pastime. Accordingly, we are proposing to suspend all negative rhetoric toward a certain franchise 250 miles to our south—the one that isn't the Mets.
Henceforth, all fan memorabilia should take the quietly reserved tone of the above t-shirt (available through the ONION store)—simply pointing out the obvious fact that "the sports team from my area is superior to the sports team from your area". Polite, precise, dignified.
No need for "Yankees You-Know-What". No need to point out that Red Sox fans are obviously smarter, more knowledgeable and less obnoxious than the mob that turns out for so-called baseball in that showcase of America—the Bronx. Never again need we remind them that their pond scum owner's cash has bought precisely NO CHAMPIONSHIPS in this century. None of that is necessary anymore. There, doesn't that feel better?