Fenway Opening Day: 2062

Recently, Sox President and CEO Larry Lucchino stated that the final phase of FenwayPark renovation by the NOG (New Ownership Group) would be, in part, waterproofing the 1912 and 1934 "bowls" in the field itself. This would, he boldly proclaimed, keep John Updike's "lyric little bandbox" up and running for "fifty more years." Fifty more years.

So much for any hope I had of expanded leg-room (or any leg-room for that matter) in my cramped Grandstand seat. And completely forget about cup-holders and unobstructed views. At this rate, my son might not ever see these base amenities in his lifetime. It may fall to our grandchildren to have even a whiff of a state-of-the-art, 21st Century baseball experience in Boston.

I can just see it now, the Grand Opening of the New Fenway in 2062--the 150th anniversary of the old ballpark's debut. John Henry IV, and 89-year old Theo Epstein are on hand to cut the ribbon that will usher in a new era of Boston baseball. All across the region, orthopedic specialists bemoan the loss of a steady stream of gimpy knees, misaligned backs and stiff necks that were the loving gift from the Grand Old Lady on Yawkey Way.

So, let's enjoy the "ambiance" while we still can. Fork over the 85 bucks and drink in the discomfort!